08 Feb Raising Gen Z’s In The Modern Day Society
By Geraldine Tan-Lim, 1988
Last February 6, 2019, a parent seminar entitled Chaos and Control: The Modern-Day Parent Raising Gen
Z’s In This Society was conducted by ICA Alumna Sabrina Tan, Ph.D at the ICA MPH1. A very engaging
speaker, Dr. Tan described the current environment of our daughters versus their developmental tasks
(and the stress that ensues), then shared with us practical tips on how to develop self-regulation skills in
our children so they can achieve overall success in this modern world.
The world today is fast-paced, hyper connected, with so much information from many sources that are
all within reach. There is too much versus not enough, which tend to bring out overwhelming emotions
in our children. They become anxious, sad or angry. As parents, we have to teach them how to manage
their emotions. Dr. Tan imparted strategies she termed the 4Cs: Calm/Control, Comfort, Consider, and
Collaborate. Calm/Control are mostly behavioral strategies like deep breathing, counting, taking a walk,
getting a drink, or listening to music. Comfort is feeling what the other is going through. Consider is
being aware of the negative thought, challenging it, then transforming it. Lastly, collaborate is solving
the problem together.
The seminar was a positive means to start the year of the pig. It reminded me that although the modern
world has it ails and ills, it also has its assets. The goal is to make our children ready for this world by
helping them be the master of themselves, their thoughts, emotions and actions (and not the other way
around). We went home that day with a fitting quote by Ann Landers: “It is not what you do for your
children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human
beings.” Thank you Dr. Tan, we learned so much from you!